You Can't Always Get What You Want - A Lesson for All of Us

No matter what our age, whether we're 6 months or 106 years old, we humans tend to  be self-centered; we want what we want, when we want it. I guess it's just the way we're made. But, as we travel through life, we learn that our wants may not always be beneficial to us or to others. And, hopefully, we learn this sooner rather than later.

As a mother, I know that a big part of my job is to help my children become kind, responsible adults who make a positive contribution to the world. And my boys, now ages 6 and 11, are smack dab in the middle of figuring out the boundaries between their wants and needs and the rights, needs and wants of others. They're learning, but, as any mother can tell you, sometimes it's an uphill climb.

I found this video and loved it so much, I had to share it with my kids. I watched their faces as they listened to the song for the first time, and it was like magic. Poof! All those years of me explaining this concept to them didn't hold a candle to the impact that this song had them. Hey, whatever works, right? They loved it so much, we listened to it again and again.

They both looked at me and smiled. Nicholas, my oldest, wiggled his eyebrows at me like a miniature blond Groucho Marx, and asked, "Mom, are you copying the words of this song? Because I heard you say this stuff before." He got the whole point in that one little song and this was his way of showing his newly-found and accepted knowledge and some humor back at me in that very moment. 

We made a game out of it all weekend. Whenever the boys requested something that I declined, instead of just saying no, I sang softly, "You can't always get what you want." It was such a fun way to bond with one another and it put a pretty quick end to their habit of repeating requests, even after I've said no. The usual wining and complaining were replaced by chuckles and smiles.

Will this miracle last? Who knows? I'll be happy if we can keep it going for the next 30 days.

But, for me, the most important part of this experience is the lesson that I learned. 

It's all in the delivery.

With love,
-Tamera

Artificial Turf - Is it the Next Asbestos?

Have you ever heard of "ChemGrass"? No? Well, that's the original name Monsanto gave to its artificial grass product, which later became famous as "AstroTurf" after being installed in Houston's Astrodome in 1966. Fast forward to the year 2000, and the new incarnation of artificial turf - styrene butadiene rubber, or "crumb rubber" - began to be made of tiny black crumbs of pulverized tire rubber poured between artificial "grass" blades.

This crumb rubber seemed to be the answer to a multitude of problems. The loads of discarded tires that would otherwise be taking up space in landfills were put toward a useful purpose. Untold millions of gallons of water, harmful pesticides and fertilizer would no longer be needed to maintain the grass for athletic fields. In addition, the rubber from the tires added a significant cushion that was absent from the much less forgiving "AstroTurf", preventing serious injuries like broken bones and concussions. Crumb rubber is widely used in park playgrounds and soccer fields, among other places.

But, much like other innovations that were made to solve existing problems but ultimately created a whole new set of problems, crumb rubber may not be the miracle product it was designed to be.

It turns out that crumb rubber contains substances that aren't exactly good for us to be around, among them benzene, mercury, arsenic, carbon black and lead.  According to this article by NBC news, there might be serious cause for concern. 

Fun Fruit Flower!

My kids love it when I take pictures for the recipes that I post on Healthy Isn't Boring. They help me arrange the food just so and vote yes or no on the resulting pictures. 

Yesterday, I set out some fruit for a mid-afternoon snack, and we decided to cut and arrange them into different shapes. Annie came up with the flower you see above. We loved it so much, I asked her if she would like to be a "guest blogger" on my blog and she was very excited about the idea. The boys, not wanting to be outdone by their sister, wanted to make a flower for the blog, too. Well, they started building their flower, then wanted to see how tall they could make it. I made an executive decision when I saw their creation nearing the tipping point, and that's when we took a picture of it. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you:

The Fun Fruit Flower Tower

We had such a wonderful time making fruit art and then eating our designs. Although my children love fruit and veggies, I know that there are many out there who don't. One way to get your children to choose healthful treats over processed non-foods full of sugar and salt, is to let them have fun making their own meals and snacks.

You don't need to get any fancy equipment. Just spend some time with your kids, cutting out shapes and putting together creative combinations. Eventually, they will start to associate feelings of love, comfort and closeness with nutritious food. 

Nicholas, Annie and Jayden loved putting together this post for you! Please share your ideas for fruit and veggie edible art in the comments section!

From our family to yours,

Tamera, Nicholas, Annie and Jayden

Tim's Place

I don't know why, but we humans tend to be afraid of those who are different from us.  We are friends with people who look like us, think like us, dress like us; we listen to radio personalities who agree with our views; and, in times past, we even killed and imprisoned people just because they didn't fit the norm.

But now, it seems to me that we are entering a new era of understanding and acceptance, at least in some parts of the world. And, some societies are even celebrating the differences that exist among us and make life more interesting. These days, there are opportunities open to people that could not have even been imagined just a couple of generations ago.

Watching the video about Tim Harris made my eyes fill with tears. The joy and love that flows from this young man just made my day. He brought back so many wonderful memories for me. When I was in high school, and for two years after I graduated, I volunteered with Down Syndrome kids, helping them to learn how to read and swim. Later, when I opened a local dance studio with my partners, I taught dance classes specifically for Down Syndrome and disabled children.

It was so very rewarding for me because these kids are the most loving people you could ever meet. They are so open, not judgmental at all. They thrive on hugs, love and smiles. They have no enemies and their view of life is so open and innocent. With the DS kids, what you see is what you get - no pretensions, no walls - just a love of life and everything in it.

And I wonder, why is it that we "normal" people can't be more like that?

In the video, Tim is excited just about going to work! How many people feel that way? How many of us start our work day with a happy dance?

How often do we let our ideas of what we can't do stand in the way of our dreams?

What can we learn from people who are different from us, and how can we use what we learn to make the world a better place?

Tim's enthusiasm and belief in himself was so strong that it swept up everyone in his path. I wonder how many people's lives he's touched just by being himself and following his heart.

Can we each take a piece of Tim's story with us, out into the world every day? Can we learn to think in terms of how we can achieve instead of why we can't?

It is possible. I'm a believer.

We wish you a Very Merry Christmas! 

From our family to yours,

Michael, Tamera, Nicholas, Annie and Jayden

The Chicken Pox Blues

We have a new visitor at our house! 

Chicken pox. 

One at a time, each of my children has been singing the ol' Chicken Pox Blues.

On the bright side,  I'm turning into quite the chicken pox expert. Maybe I'll even achieve master level by the time the last spot has faded from the last kid.

The night before Nicholas broke out in the pox, we had just finished reading a short novel called "The Trouble with Chickens!" What are the odds, right? So, when he came to me the next morning, complaining bitterly about the itchy red bumps, I looked at him, smiled and said, "That's the trouble with chickens!" My poor baby. But, at least my little joke made him laugh and roll his eyes at me. And that, in turn, made me laugh! So, we managed to make the best out of a bad situation.  Plus, I now have a new affectionate nickname for my biggest boy. I call him "polka dot".

Right before I sat down to write this, I had just made and placed in front of him his third green drink of the day. Luckily, I had my phone in hand and was able to catch his reply in this picture. In case you can't tell, he's saying "Noooooooooooooooooo, not another green drink! How many of these do I have to have?"

Teach Your Children Well

We almost never watch TV at our house. We just have too much living to do, and, really, most of what's on TV isn't worth watching, anyway. But, every once in a while, I do turn on certain shows that I find interesting. One of these shows is The Biggest Loser. I love seeing the contestants confront their demons, push through their perceived limits and transform their lives.

This season, there's a woman on the show named Tanya who really got my attention. Her lifestyle had deteriorated so much that she gained over a hundred pounds with her last pregnancy, and her baby was born grossly overweight at 11 pounds 6 ounces. Now 2 years old, Tanya's daughter is at risk for many diseases and will be climbing an uphill battle all her life. I cried right along with Tanya when she broke down and said, "I did this to her."

And it made me think of the millions of American children who are eating fake, processed foods, and leading unhealthy, sedentary lives. When I was a child, I played outside with my friends, walked or rode my bike around town and rarely sat around the house. Contrast that with today's electronic culture of video games, TV, computers, smart phones, streets empty like ghost towns. These days, when I see kids playing outside, I'm actually surprised by it. I can't tell you how sad this makes me.

Add to this the explosion of "convenience foods", and we've got the perfect mix for a whole generation of people at risk for all kinds of diseases, from diabetes to heart disease to stroke to cancer.  It is estimated that one third of all American children and adolescents are overweight or obese. It's hard for me to wrap my mind around this number. These children will, in all likelihood, grow up to be overweight adults, and I think of all the missed opportunities, the heartbreak, the economic toll on society that will follow.

And, when I think of these children, Tanya's words echo in my mind. Children do not get fat in a vacuum. There is a whole society that sets up the conditions for this to happen. But, the situation is not hopeless. To paraphrase Gandhi, we must all strive to make the changes in ourselves that we wish to see in the world.

Do we model appropriate behavior to our children? Do we make time to teach them how to make healthful meals from real, fresh ingredients or do we microwave frankenfoods to give to them during the car ride to the shopping center, where we will circle the parking lot to find the spot nearest to the entrance of the store? Do we collapse in front of the TV after dinner or do we take a walk around the neighborhood and take the time to talk to one another about the events of the day? When our children have something to say, do we give them our undivided attention, or are we staring at our smartphones?

Small changes add up to big consequences. Be mindful. Make good choices. And, remember, children are always watching and learning. What are we teaching them?

Product Review - Against All Grain

People often say to me, "Tamera, you must have the healthiest diet of anyone I know. How do you get your kids to eat so clean?"

Well, a few answers come to mind. I'm not perfect and I certainly don't have it all figured out. While I do have a lot of knowledge about health and nutrition, the simple fact is that each individual body has its own needs, and there is no cure-all diet for everyone. The truth is that I am always learning and modifying based on new research that comes out, plus my own personal observations about how the foods we eat affect my family and me. More about that in a minute. 

SOS

We had a lovely summer, and before we knew it, it was almost time for the kids to go back to school again. I wanted to spend some special time with my children before hopping onto the crazy happy merry-go-round of school-dance-piano-homework-sports-friends-etc. So, we decided to take a road trip, hang out together and just really enjoy being a family. In the twelve days that we spent driving around the country, we got that and so much more than we could have ever anticipated.

Upon entering Kansas, we spotted a note hanging from the "Welcome to Kansas" sign.  Well, curiosity being our calling card, we just had to investigate. This is what we found:

The Best Gift Ever

Being a mom is a crazy roller coaster ride of emotions. Anyone who's ever been a parent will tell you that it's the hardest job in the world. And most of them will also say that they wouldn't trade it for anything. I am one of those people. I can't even begin to imagine my life without my children. Sometimes the word "love" just doesn't seem big enough to describe what I feel for them.

But there are those times when I just need a moment to clear my head. Like the other day, Nicholas and Jayden were bickering, the same way brothers all throughout time have done. Usually I let them resolve their differences on their own. They need to learn how to get along with people without having mommy step in to make everything all right. But on this particular day, they just couldn't come to an understanding and it got a little bit much. So I made sure that there was nothing seriously wrong and then I went outside and took a long walk. The fresh air and the sight of serene Klamath Lake helped refresh my mind, and, by the time I returned home, I was ready to deal with anything the kids had in store for me. 

What I got, was this:

I beamed at my daughter, wrapped her up in a bear hug and covered her with kisses. 

"Open it, mama!"

I did. 

And everything was perfect.

What is Joy?

With three children and a business to tend to, I find myself slipping into “functioning mom” mode pretty often. I’m usually so busy doing what needs to get done - supervising all the kids’ activities, cooking, cleaning, solving problems, big and small – that, at the end of the day, I’m often left wondering, “Where did the time go?” And, sometimes, during the late hours after everyone else has gone to bed, I feel totally depleted, like I have nothing left to give. 

That is very hard for me to admit to.

Do I love my children more than life itself? Absolutely. No question about it. I truly adore the day-to-day life of being a mom. Even the mundane parts, like reminding the kids to pick up after themselves or brush their teeth. And I cherish every moment of this fleeting time with my precious ones, because I know that, in what will seem like the blink of an eye, they will be grown and have lives independent of me.

That’s why I cringe with surprised disappointment when that little voice whispers to me every once in a while, “What about me?”

Guest Post - Jessica Wick

Chasing Butterflies

These days our lives are busy, rushed, and filled with technology. While technology makes our lives easier it can cause a disconnect with those around you, especially your children. It is important to take the time from your schedule several times a week to enjoy simple activities that will help you bond with your children. My personal favorite – chasing butterflies!

Chasing butterflies is as fun and as simple as it sounds. Do you remember chasing them as a child? We use a camera instead of a butterfly net in our family to prevent any unwanted injuries to our beautiful flying friends. It doesn’t have to be butterflies. It could be flowers, rocks, rivers or anything else you find pretty and exciting. Pick something that you both enjoy finding and make each trip an adventure. It can be a new activity each time.

Keep your camera available during your outings. The pictures are fun to use in a scrapbook or for starting a collection. Keeping a record of your fun is a great bonding experience (do arts and crafts together) and the results are something you will cherish for years to come. You also catch some of the best photos of your children when they are playing instead of posing for the camera.

Keep things simple when you go out to chase your butterflies. Turn off your cell phone and give yourself and your child the time you need to relax and enjoy life. Talk to them about their day and discuss their hopes and dreams. Take the time to connect and know them as well as yourself. It provides the opportunity to be comfortable in each other’s company without expectations.

The goal is not to catch your butterflies – it is to bond with your kids. It is taking the time to be a part of their life in simple ways. Start when they are young and continue it throughout their years for a better relationship. If you make the time to talk about small things they will feel more comfortable coming to you for the big things.

What kind of butterflies do you chase?

Jessica Wick is one of our very own E3Live employees, she enjoys teaching her three children about organic gardening, has a horse, a goat, 2 dogs and a flock of chickens that also love E3Live!

"You don't have to find out you're dying to start living."

I first heard about Zach Sobiech when a friend shared a post about him on Upworthy. Zach passed away on May 20, 2013 from a rare form of cancer. Every year, cancer is responsible for cutting short the lives of millions of people and forever altering the lives of millions more.  Each of their stories is unique and tragic in its own way. Here's Zach's. It may be difficult to watch, but I promise that it's worth your time.




If you like Zach's music, you can buy his album on iTunes here. It's $5.99 and the proceeds go to a research fund set up on his behalf. Or you can donate money to the research fund directly here.

I am not affiliated in any way with Zach Sobiech, his family, iTunes or the Children's Cancer Research Fund. I just really want to share this extraordinary story of a young man who rose above circumstances to be a shining example to all of us.

With love and gratitude, 
Tamera

Update from Upworthy:

Hey, everyone —

Zach Sobiech died last week. He left behind one of the most moving stories we've ever heard. We posted it on our site. And what's happened since then has blown all of our minds.

• Millions of people around the world have Liked Zach's story and shared it with their friends.

• Browsers have translated it into 21 languages (though apparently, "Wondtacular" doesn't have a translation).

• One of Zach's original recordings rose to the #1 slot on iTunes (the first time a song by an independent artist did so) and debuted on the Billboard Top 100 as the #1 digital track in the "Rock" category.

• And folks have donated hundreds of thousands of dollars to the research fund set up on his behalf to help change the fates of other kids suffering from cancer.

Sharing something on the Internet can help change the world. And that, in our opinion, is pretty wondtacular.

Magic Beans!

Lima Bean Plant Growing Up and Out 

 Part of the joy of having children is experiencing life through their eyes. Things I take for granted are transformed into exciting adventures simply because they are brand new for my kids. In some ways, it’s like getting a fresh start in life and I love it.

Last week, Jayden’s class began a new project that had him practically jumping up and down with joy. He got to grow his own lima bean, nurturing it from a dry little kernel to a vibrant green plant. He adores his little lima bean green, and he’s learning all about the root system of the plant by watching it grow in real time.

If you have young children, this is a wonderful and easy project for them. All you need is an old CD case, some dirt, scotch tape, a dry lima bean and water.

Directions:

All the Campbells Had a Farm (E-I-E-I-O)

DAY 1

We love to grow things – flowers, veggies, herbs, you name it. Our gardens do need a lot of love and attention, which we are happy to give them. But, sometimes, it’s nice to be able to grow plants that require almost no effort. And, if we can eat the results, then all the better!

DAY 6

Here’s a gardening idea that costs pennies, requires no special equipment and can be done on a windowsill you already have laying around the house. What’s not to love?

It’s a well known fact that green onions are a delicious and nutritious addition to an unlimited variety of dishes. We put them in almost everything – salads, soups, veggie wraps – whatever our imaginations can come up with. Some time back, I learned that we can cut off the green parts of the onions and eat them, and instead of throwing the root parts away, they can be used to grow another batch of onions! I tried it out, and what do you know, it works!

Make Your Own Rules!

If you’re like most people, you probably have a word game or two sitting in a box somewhere in the dark corners of a closet. You know, the ones that have tiles with letters on them that you use to make words of varying point value? Now, don’t get me wrong, I love a good, long game of Scrabble, or Boggle or any number of other similar games, but sometimes, you just don’t want to be so formal. Also, if you’ve got young children, like I do, these games are a bit over their heads.

I know that one of the most important things I can do as a mom is to foster a love of reading, learning and thinking in my children. And it’s no secret that making learning fun and game-like is the best way to do that. It’s also well-known that puzzles and critical thinking games develop their brains in a different way than do “non-thinking” games like tag or hide-and-go-seek.

One rainy day, we were hanging around the house, thinking of what we could do for fun. Nicholas found my box of Scrabble in the games cupboard and decided that he wanted to learn how to play. Well, at the time he was about 7 years old, and, while his vocabulary and spelling ability was well above the average for his age, I knew that he wasn’t quite ready for a full-fledged game.

So, I told him that I COULD teach him to play Scrabble, if that’s what he wanted, but I knew a SECRET way to play that was a lot more fun. That’s all I had to say and all three kids were jumping up and down, wanting to learn the secret game.

Go Climb a Tree

Every once in a while, Michael and I don’t quite see eye to eye.  Nothing unusual about that. Like most couples, we talk through the issues and come to a compromise. On the topic of child rearing, he tends to be a bit more overprotective than I am. Don’t get me wrong, I worry and fret about my babies’ emotional and physical well being just as much as he does, if not more. But, I know that part of my job as a mom is to prepare my children to function independently in a world that may be indifferent and even hostile at times.

After months of renovation work, we finally moved into our new house a couple of weeks ago. I love that we have plenty of room to spread out, and a yard full of lush greenery with magnificent trees. The kids love it, too. Especially the part about the trees.  And that’s where Michael and I disagree a bit.

He thinks that it’s far too dangerous for kids to climb trees. I say, let them climb. Is there a chance that they’ll fall and get a little scraped up? Sure. 

“What if they break an arm or a leg? What will you do then?” says Michael. 

That’s a bridge I’d rather not think about crossing. Of course, I’d be heartbroken, like any mother would be. My tears would flow more easily and with greater strength than my injured child’s. But we would get to a doctor, be fitted with a cast and learn to be more careful in the future.

I took an informal poll amongst my friends and was truly surprised at the differences of opinion. Then, I did a bit of searching on the Internet. It seems that the issue isn’t as straightforward as I had assumed. In my world, childhood equals playing in the dirt, climbing trees, scraping knees and going indoors only when the sun goes down.

But, for a lot of moms and dads – well, moms more than dads - the risks outweigh the advantages, it seems. I read about the hazards, the what-ifs and the keep-them-safe-at-all-costs opinions.

Gratitude

A friend recently sent me this video and it made my day. Life truly is wondrous.  Let's take the time to appreciate every moment we are given. Enjoy and share with those who are dear to you.

Tamera

Out of the Mouths of Babes

Recently, I watched in wonder as a boy of about 10 years rode a unicycle expertly down one of the streets in my neighborhood. He was obviously having a great time, gliding up and down driveways, tracing large circles on the sidewalk and generally looking about as comfortable on that one wheel as most people do hanging out in their favorite easy chair. When he looked up and saw me admiring him, his face beamed with pride and joy.  I called out, “You are really good at that!”

“Thank you!” He smiled and rode toward me.

“How long have you been riding?”

“Oh, not too long. I started practicing on my friend’s uni every day after school. I just got my own today.” As we spoke, he maintained his equilibrium by rolling back and forth a couple of feet in front

G-M-Oh-Oh (Part 3)

Pretty scary stuff, don’t you think? What I find most disturbing is how quickly GMOs have entered our food supply without proper research and understanding of their long-term impact on our health and well-being. We have already had confirmed instances of harm.

For example, in 1989, dozens of Americans died and several thousands were afflicted and impaired by a genetically altered version of the food supplement – L-tryptophan. A settlement of $2 billion dollars was paid by Showa Denko, Japan’s third largest chemical company.

But that’s not all. There are so many other potential risks we face as a result of the spread of genetically modified crops. Here’s a sampling: